Awareness of My Orientation
BY JERRY MCKAY
My orientation continued to manifest on a daily basis, and there were times when it intruded noticeably. As in high school, it sometimes caused me to modify my behavior. Four examples have stayed with me all these years.
But before I continue, I feel it’s important to reiterate that, even though I can now write about these situations with a high degree of awareness, at the time I still had not named my experience. I did not identify as homosexual or gay. I was, however, growing increasingly aware of how differently I experienced the world compared to my male friends.
You and Your Health
BY JERRY MCKAY
You and Your Health is a three-volume set focusing on concerns and questions related to health. I don't remember the first time I pulled it off the library shelf; but, when I did, I did so surreptitiously to avoid being asked what I was reading. I know I looked at it several times during high school and college. Browsing through it was not a good experience. Before I look at the article, I have two questions.
First, who is most likely to pick up a reference book to do research on homosexuality? I hope you answered, Someone wondering about his or her own experience.
High School Years at Kingsway
BY JERRY MCKAY
As with my childhood, themes characterize my high school years. The things I did as part of my spiritual discipline at home continued and evolved. My orientation was always present; and, like before, there were many times when it forced itself into my awareness in ways I could not ignore. In high school, naturally, the expectation to date increased; and I tried.
To this part of my story, I have added a new dimension. I contacted a friend from high school and asked him to share his observations of me during that time.
School
BY JERRY MCKAY
Memories of my early school years are generally positive, but adolescent memory is selective. As might be expected, it is the rare and bizarre events that have stayed with me.
My first two years of education were in one-room schools with one teacher responsible for all eight grades. Mrs. Millar ran a tight ship and yet created a warm environment. There were a lot of open-book exercises and copious copying of notes from the board. If we finished our work, we colored quietly and listened to what was being taught to the upper grades. Our library consisted of ten small shelves behind two doors at the front of the classroom.
Introduction
BY JERRY MCKAY
Most of what characterizes my life today—work, family, and faith—looks little like what I thought it would when I graduated from college in 1980. Because of my sexual orientation, nothing is as I expected. I still identify as Seventh-day Adventist, but I do not have the same relationship with my church as I once had. I am open about my orientation to most people, and I have been in a relationship for nearly twenty-five years. Don’t let that fact, however, lead you to make assumptions about my theology. That I am a professing Christian is applauded by some and questioned by others. LGBT acquaintances and some heterosexual friends often ask me why I continue to associate with a faith community that has had a checkered relationship with its LGBT members. Others wonder how I can consider myself a Christian while in a relationship.
In addition to the why-do-I-continue and the how-can-I-consider-myself questions are a multitude of other questions that people have asked me over the years.